I won't be doing quite as many amusement parks this year than in the recent past. If you read my previous column, you'll remember my first visit to what we call "The Land" - the property my parent's purchased and on which are currently building a cabin.

I will be spending half of my weekends in Little Meadows, Pennsylvania helping out with the work. Suddenly, I'm a carpenter again. The good thing is that I've learned that swinging a hammer is like riding a bike. You never really forget.

My first weekend was a tough one, coming over Memorial Day weekend. We worked from 9:00 am to 8:00 pm with about a 1/2 hour break on Saturday and Sunday, and then 9:00 am to 5:00 pm on Monday. It was less hours than my normal workday, but this was real work - both physical and mental. And my feet seemed to pay the biggest price.

By the end of the weekend my feet were sorer than I can ever remember. The first thing I needed to do upon arriving back home was get out my foot massager and hope that it still worked. It's one of those bases with the bumps and the entire thing shakes. There are also two infrared bumps to add heat to the message. This helped immensely and helped me relax. I was relaxed enough to fall asleep.

Unfortunately for me, the base does not have an automatic shut-off for the infrared heat. This became clear when I woke up wondering what that smell was. Or why my foot hurt. Or why there was smoke coming from my...ouch! I spent the next five minutes running around my apartment, as if that was going to help. It didn't. The massager is now tucked away in the closet again, but I'm sure I'll be back with it after the upcoming weekend, as I head back to the Land. But now on to more important things...

Coaster 3:16's Vacation In Orlando - The Magic Kingdom

Over the past two columns I have covered the first two days of my impromptu vacation in Orlando. A brief recap would include a change in flights with a three-hour layover in Pittsburgh and me eventually being bumped from that flight. Friday morning (Day Two), I arrived in Orlando too late to start the day at Animal Kingdom, which will have to wait for another trip.

Instead, I spent day two split between MGM Studios and Epcot Center. Both were enjoyed, with my taking note that the attractions far outweighed the atmosphere I was expecting. Still, that meant that I had a great time at both parks.

I am not going to go into details about Day Three, which was spent at Sea World. I covered that park a little over a year ago, and included it just a few issues ago as my second-favorite corporate park. I'll just summarize my day by saying that Sea World cemented its spot at #2 on that list. I had a great time and was not ready to leave when the park closed.

The day I was most looking forward to was my day at Magic Kingdom. I really did not know what to expect. I'm a traditional amusement park fan first. I'd rather go to an "Overgrown Carnival" than to "Fantasyland". But would the magic of the Magic Kingdom shine through?

It started as one of those mornings where I woke up early in anticipation. I was so much earlier than I needed to be that I took my time getting ready, and by the time I had checked out of the hotel I was fifteen minutes late. It took longer to get to the Magic Kingdom than I expected. I had forgotten just how huge the Disney complex as a whole is.

The parking lot was fairly empty, but there were a ton of people at the ticketing area. I had no idea which was quicker, the ferryboat or the monorail. As I was walking up to the booth I was passed by a lady and what I am assuming was her adult daughter. They were walking very fast with huge smiles on their faces. I got the sense that they had done this before, so I decided to follow them in hopes that they would lead me to the quickest way to the Magic Kingdom, which would be opening in just a few minutes.

They chose the ferryboat. This turned out to be a wonderful choice. Not only did I walk right on to the boat, I was also able to get to the opposite end of the boat and watch the incredible view of Cinderella's Castle coming closer as the boat approached the main entrance. I got to the entrance right as the park had opened and walked right in. My first trip to the Magic Kingdom in over fifteen years was about to begin.

I was able to dodge all of the picture takers and make my way down Main Street, U.S.A. in relatively quick order. My plan for the day had been to do as many attractions as possible without feeling like I was rushing through the park. I knew that I wouldn't really follow that pattern, I rarely do, but still I wasn't going to run from ride to ride.

First up was Splash Mountain. This was a new ride to me, as it was built long after my most recent visit. I walked right on the ride, noting what I assumed would have been a good queue to wait in. It seemed to be themed well, yet not overdone. I really didn't take much time to look around, though.

Splash Mountain quickly became my favorite ride of the trip. The story was easy to follow and was fun. The theming all seemed to make sense and the ending was perhaps my favorite of all-time. Not for the thrills, but for the pure fun. Everything about Splash Mountain, from the pacing of the ride, to the quality of the animatronics, to the story itself, seemed absolutely perfect. My boat, which included a family of four in the first two rows and another single guy in the row in front of me, were all clapping and humming as we traveled through the final scenes.

A part of me wishes I would have done Splash Mountain last, as I imagine it being a perfect way to end the day, but the more I think about it the more I realize that there isn't a better way to start a day a park anywhere if your goal is to have fun.

With a gigantic smile on my face I made my way over to Big Thunder Mountain Railroad. BTMR is neither a thrilling nor exciting ride, but it just seems to fit at Disney. Its one of those rides I can't really say anything bad about, but it is also one of those rides I didn't really care to do again.

I had to backtrack back to Adventureland and Pirates of the Caribbean. PotC is one of those rides where it seems that the animatronics are there just because they could be. The ride could have gotten away with either a faster speed or by leaving out a scene or two. I don't want to leave the impression that I was disappointed with the ride, because I wasn't. It is just that this is not a perfect ride. Still, had I had the time, I could easily have seen myself riding again.

That was enough of Adventureland. Only Jungle Cruise was something I would have thought about doing, but I had other things I was more interested in. That included the Haunted Mansion. By this time of the day, there were still no lines. The Stand By line sign at the entrance to the ride said that the wait was "13" minutes. I thought that was a nice touch.

The scariest moment of my trip came as I was walking through the queue of the mansion. The guy in front of me had stopped to look at a few of the tombstones in front of the door, so I stopped to take a look, too. I had read a few of them when I got this feeling somebody was looking at me. When I looked up, what I saw was one of the scariest looking guys I've ever seen. He was a cast member and he never broke character as he gave me this look as if to say "You're wasting everybody's time. Get inside."

Without saying a word, he closed the door behind me when I walked into the mansion and walked RIGHT behind me as I entered the room with the pre-show. I felt about five inches tall standing next to a guy who was only a few inches taller than me, but had caught me off guard.

The ride? Well, I can't add much more to what has already been said about Haunted Mansion. It's not necessarily a scary ride. It's just impressive. The closing scene with the ghost sitting next to you worked perfect for me. I was sitting alone and the ghost I got was one that turned his head and stared at you. I was sitting in such a way that he was staring just an inch from my face. I noticed the father behind me and the mother behind me both laughing at how good this looked. It was finally enough to make me smile, as I had been afraid to smile in the pre-show or during the rest of the ride fearing that the guy who was at the front door would yell at me.

For some reason, I always thought that you had to walk all the way back toward the castle to get from the Haunted Mansion to Fantasyland, but I obviously was wrong. I walked up to It's A Small World and Peter Pan's Flight. Small World was a walk-on, but Peter Pan had a posted fifteen-minute wait. I made a small mistake by going to Small World first and then grabbing a PP Fast Pass. I would have been better off getting the Pass first, then riding Small World. That way, I could have timed it to walk off the boat and right onto Peter Pan. But anyway, lines would be short enough that my time management errors were minimal.

It's A Small World is an often misunderstood ride. It is a kids' ride. There is no doubt about that. But, it is a kids' ride with a message that adults often just don't get. I have heard so many people say that they get the small world song stuck in their head for the rest of the day. They say it as if it is a bad thing. It shouldn't be. It didn't happen to me anyway, as I still had Zippedy Do Da in my head from my Splash Mountain ride earlier in the day. But, small world is a favorite of mine. I don't quite get how anybody could come out of the ride not feeling good, but that is why everybody was built differently.

I grabbed my Fast Pass for Peter Pan and made my way down to the other end of Fantasyland. I have to admit, Mr. Toad's Wild Ride was not one of my favorite rides. I certainly was not sad to see it go. Winnie The Pooh isn't one of my favorite characters, but my nieces love him and I've gotten to know him rather well over the last four years. So, I was more than willing to wait twenty minutes for the ride.

The story was a little hard to follow for me (what does it say about me when I have a hard time keeping up with a children's story?). But, the interaction between the ride and the characters was fun. I especially liked bouncing along with Tigger. By the time the ride was over, I didn't quite know what I had done; I just know I enjoyed it. To that degree, it reminded me of Spiderman over at Islands of Adventure.

When I got off of Winnie, I noticed what I would call "the disgrace". It is bad enough that Disney had to remove 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea, which was a classic ride to begin with. But they never replaced it. Much of it is still sitting there. You can still see where the queue was (which I believe is being used for part of the character festival). You can also see where you boarded the ride, including the two loading zones, and much of the track. The site of 20,000 just sitting there, almost SBNO, was sad and pathetic. Please, Disney, if you are going to remove a ride, remove the entire ride or at least cover it up.

Stepping off of my soapbox, I had some time before my flight with Peter Pan, so I walked down to Tomorrowland. That's when I saw the other thing I don't like about Magic Kingdom.

I know it is an original ride. I know people love it. I know, I know. But, the Tomorrowland Indy Speedway is completely, totally, and undeniably out of place at Walt Disney World. It is not themed at all and is a ride that can be found at practically every other park in the US. There is nothing "special" about this ride at all. Even if you don't care for the other attractions at WDW, each one of them has something special to them. Not so, with the Speedway. Get rid of it, I say.

Wow, you would think I wasn't having the time of my life at this point, wouldn't you?

Anyway, my first stop in Tomorrowland was Buzz Lightyear's Space Ranger Spin, which had a seven-minute or so wait. This ride was awesome. It has all of the fun of a Sally Rides shoot 'em up, with the added bonus of the ability to spin your cars. When I first boarded, I was just shot at the targets and spun when needed, but I wanted to spin and spin and spin, so I just held the joystick to the side.

The first time I turned around I noticed that the older lady behind me was trying to shoot me. I don't know if she didn't understand the point of the ride, or if I had said something while waited in line, but every time I spun my car around during that ride there she was, blasting away. I think I've met her daughter.

I was beginning to run out of time to use my Peter Pan Fast Pass, so I ran to Space Mountain, grabbed a Fast Pass for that, and then went back to Peter Pan. Of the older rides at the park, Peter Pan is probably my favorite. You may recall that I love the feeling of being made to feel like I'm outdoors when I'm not. The one scene in Peter Pan, when you are flying over the city, is absolutely fantastic. If one great spot of airtime can make a rollercoaster, this one scene can make a dark ride.

I went back to Tomorrowland and got in line for ExtraTERRORestrial Alien Encounter. Nope. Didn't understand it. I didn't find it scary, funny, or the least bit entertaining. Most of the people with me were screaming and generally having a great time. I just wasn't one of them.

Luckily, I was in for a pleasant surprise after that last major disappointment. The surprise came in the form of Space Mountain. I had completely forgotten about the chocolate chip cookies in the station, which brought a smile to my face. But it wasn't the cookies that were the pleasant surprise, it was the ride itself. Space Mountain is not a bad ride. In fact, it is a pretty good ride indeed. There were unexpected turns and dips and it seemed to keep going and going. Maybe in a thrill park it would disappointment, but in its spot at Magic Kingdom, Space Mountain is a classic.

I grabbed a Fast Pass for Buzz Lightyear and hopped on the Tomorrowland Transit Authority. I wish I knew what it was about this ride I like so much. It seems outdated and really doesn't do anything. Still, it's a relaxing ride with a neat view of Space Mountain and Buzz Lightyear, so was worth it for me.

The Carousel of Progress, which had been my favorite Magic Kingdom attraction on previous trips ("Now is the time, now is the best time, now is the best time of your life"), was closed on this day. This could not dampen my day, though, as I was having too much fun. I did Buzz Lightyear again and had now completed every ride that was on my "must do" list, plus a few others, and I still had more than three hours to go before I even had to think about leaving.

I decided to take advantage of my time to walk slowly around the park. If there were something I wanted to do, or do again, I would do it. If not, I would just walk around. I went inside the Hall Of Presidents to see the new President Bush, who got a nice applause when he began talking. It was nice to see that. It was kind of odd, though, that the cast member that introduced the presentation had a thick foreign accent of some sort. I don't know what that means, but it just seemed odd.

I walked through Fantasyland and back into Mickey's Toontown Fair. It didn't quite have the theming of the rest of the park, but the kids all seemed to be having fun. I took the Walt Disney World Railroad for the full trip around the park and back to Toontown. After that, I still had time for Cinderella's Golden Carrousel and Snow White's Scary Adventure (which I found scarier than ExtraTERRORestrial).

Taking the time to walk around the park was the perfect idea for me. I was able to see the true beauty of this place. I got to see it through the eyes of the families I watched, the young couples I watched, and the retirees I watched. It also reminded me of my own childhood, and my memories of being here with my own family and how much I looked forward to coming back soon.

The Magic Kingdom really is magical. There is something around every corner, and almost all of it is full of quality. All you need is a simple attitude and you can give yourself a great day at this place. If California's Disneyland is so much better, as everybody has told me it is, then that must be heaven.

Apparently, my walking pace was rather slow, as I had used up a lot of time doing it. I wanted to see the Share A Dream Come True Parade, but didn't have time to see it all and spend adequate time shopping for souvenirs. So, I walked to what was the end of the parade route and walked to the start of the route, seeing all of the parade that way. I then did my shopping and it was sadly time to go.

I've defined the term "Special Day" as a day where you have to fight back tears when you leave because you just don't want to go. In a good year, it will happen twice. My day at Magic Kingdom was the second consecutive Special Day. In fact, it went one better than even that. As I got off the monorail and walked to the queue for the tram to take me back to the parking lot, I glanced behind me. Through the ticket booths there I had a perfect view of Cinderella's Castle in the distance. It looked so far away. I suppose I shouldn't admit it, but one of the tears I had been holding back while walking down Main Street for the last time had slipped out.

I wiped away the tear and boarded the tram. My vacation was over.

X Marks The...Not

Six Flags Magic Mountain's newest coaster, X, has been closed for the time being. The intensity of the ride, and the design of the trains, have combined to ruin the trains. Unfortunately, the ride will not be open for the ACE summer conference, which will be ongoing while this issue is online. This makes two hyped-up rides that have closed this year. The first being Hypersonic XLC at Paramount's Kings Dominion, and now X. Hypersonic should be reopening in a few weeks, but X we're not certain about. Arrow Dynamics has enough financial troubles to keep them on the sidelines, and Six Flags isn't prepared to handle such a situation. It may be awhile before X is running again.

I'll stop here for this time. I would have added more, but as I am writing this the Detroit Red Wings have won the Stanley Cup. It is time for me to celebrate. With that, I'm off for now. Thank you for going back to Disney World with me and on June 27 (more likely the 28th), I'll be back with some thoughts on park marketing strategies and more. Until then, take a back seat ride once for me...

                                                                                 Coaster 3:16

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